Jefke.com

i just reread this after a posting error. um, this isn’t for the faint of heart…so read on if you like. but don’t complain that i didn’t warn you.

so i just offloaded a batch of 81 pics from our regular digicam and about 30 or so low fi pics from our video camera, and i’m realizing that we’re getting close to having 500 pics of the captain–about 85% of them are of his face- they can be broken in to about 3 or 4 groups:

• staring at the camera with a blank stare
• sort of smiling but looking like he’s going to puke b/c we took the pic a millisecond too early or late
• looking like he’s about to explode

i guess it makes sense, i mean for all intent and purposes (a phrase that thought was really "for all intensive purposes" until about 4 years ago) there’s no harm in taking a billizion bad pictures, i mean it’s pretty much free, except for the juice to run the cameras and shit. i wonder if we had to pay to have this shit developed if we’d be taking less. i’m sure that’s the case.

but in bigger terms, i’m getting terrified with the digital camera culture. yesterday exmanager/coworker jimmy and i stumbled across (pronounced "acrossT" around here) a bizarre and freaky webphoto community. actually the backstory is amusing–well at least to me. it’s my website and you came here on your own, so you get to hear it.

Jimmy seems to have an obsession with the band Molly Hatchet. i mean well what’s not to be obsessed with. i can’t for the life of me name any of their songs. but i’ll be dammed if there is a band with better custom-van-airbrush cover art out there.  so some how the band thin lizzy came up–you know the boys are back in town band. now for many years i thought they did the godzilla song. but yesterday i learned that is in fact blue oyster cult (more cow bell). so then we got joking about which band would have a better tribute band. then jimmy had the idea for a combination tribute band. naturally we floated some names….

thin hatchet
hatchet lizzy
molly lizzy.

so i did a websearch (known as googling) on molly lizzy. that in turn led me to a website.  so i’m a voyeur, so i looked at her album. and then we looked at other people’s albums (i’ll let you do your own exploring

so we noticed a couple things:

1. college kids take a lot of pictures whilst partying. hell why not–i say
2. chicks, err, young women, dress um, differently than when i was in college
3. chicks, umm, young women, seem to make out with other chicks, err, young women a lot more than when i was in college.
4. people seem to like to put a lot of extra letttteeeerrrrrrrssss in the captions of their piccccccctttturrrrreessss.
5. interestingly enough, guys in college look and appear to act as fucking stupid as when i was in college.
6. my hypothesis that belly button rings are a "gateway drug" of sorts to the adult entertainment industry (read stripping and pr0n), whether paid (pr0n), or this new free online photo community shit, has been further substantiated.

now this is all well and good–but really why are people putting this up on the internet? i mean, is this shit you want the world to see–you slutting it up with your friends in the dorm? ok let me rephrase that, is this shit you want a dirtbag like me to see? you get my drift…right–you see where this is going?  i mean, this is women doing this on their own it appears…i always used to wonder how girls gone wild got their footage….apparently it’s not that hard, since these chicks are taking the pics and posting them it on their own–for free

man, must be great to be a father in this day and age: "oh good there’s my 19 year old daughter with her hand down her friend’s shirt, a bottle of Bacardi razberry in her other hand and a dood with a baseball hat on crocked behind her with his hand down her pants. i’m getting my $29k’s worth out of that school–oh a this little pic is availble to billions on the internet–excellent! oh and she’s not even getting paid for all of this…right on!–i can’t wait till jenkins brings this up in the lunchroom"

all of this, in turn,  makes me feel old. just plain old. i’m actually embarrassed for these people, and not all "NICE!! FREE PORN!!" like i would have been a few years ago. oh i’m not all preachy, i still surfed around—but i definitely didn’t enjoy it like i once would have.  man, take me out to pasture and shoot me, i’ve got  nothing left.  nothing.

but seriously, what does this say about out times? 

maybe nothing. maybe it says that these are the best times ever…well best times to have an internet connection at least.

it’s weird how flip people are with posting shit on the internet. i mean, this shit is worldwide, people. and shit don’t disappear either. that internet time machine thing is out there, spidering, storing that pic of you passed out in the toilet in the frat house, you know, the time the brothers wrote "deposit jizz here –>" with the arrow pointing to your mouth. have fun running for congress in 2028.

and no, sally–i’m sure mom and dad won’t see that shot of you licking the body shot off of that guy’s butt crack–i mean even if they did, mom was crazy when she did all the coke in 1983 at that new wave club right, the one she went to after club 54 wasn’t cool anymore….well she might have been, but it’s not posted up for all to see and she doesn’t have a jizz target tattoo on her back to remind everyone of her more wild days.

ah youth–it’s not wasted on the young. it’s the young that are wasted. hmm that’s either that’s very poetic or stupid. hmm, i’ll ponder that.

i suppose a blog is the same– i’ve had a couple tastes of some good ole backlash from this baby. i definetly not gonna get a job at peta defending rats anytime soon.

i dunno something about the pics of college jackassery, male and female that gets me worried for these kids, i dunno. maybe i’ve been watching too much of that rome show on hbo. could this whole western/technologcial culture be on its way down—and this time instead of hot sex street shows it’s web pages of barely legal girl on girl action? there was a recent article that was presented to me by my my.yahoo page (which i can’t access for some reason…telephone pole guys!!??) where some new media company surveyed a lot of brits asking about techno buzz words.

nobody knew what blogging was. though it seems the all know about dogging, some weird thing where people fuck in front of groups of people in parking lots out in the country side–it seems one sends text messages out to people and they all gather and watch people fucking–bizzare. oh and they know about happy slapping, where one kid slaps an innocent person on teh street, and another kid films in on their cell phone and they distribute it on the web–to great chuckles of the interweb. that sort of shit scares me. i imagine that doesn’t happen over here b/c somebody would slap some guy and that guy would just shoot him. that’s be great up on the web. good times.

ok i’ll stop now. i’m just worried kids–think about it, after the roman empire there was the dark ages–where people got all religious and shit—it could happen again only this time instead of gregorian chants there’ll be some sort of fundementalist something chant (ok that didn’t-work did it).

so lets sum up–the internet has led to people having more fun in college now than i had, girls make out with girls seemingly without any external encouragement and then take pictures of it and post it on the internet, which had led to the decline of western civilzation and the rise of fundimentalist backlash that will tumble us into another dark age.

it’s a straight line of reasoning….i think…

er…ahem…