this morn, i opened up my condiment/napkin/back up altoid drawer to retrieve a napkin. I am shocked to report that somehow the stock pile of conidment packets, mixed with the curiously strong peppermint fumes have somehow combined to infuse the scent of lighter fluid in my napkins. the shit is really strong too. taken seperately, the altoids smell cursiously pepperminty, and the condiments smell like the little plastic packets, as you’d expect
perhaps some strange chemical reaction is happening? shoudl i be worried about spontaenous combustion? like that story your mom tells you about keeping rags soaked in turpintine in a confined space. god knows i have lots of turpintine soaked rags, and my natural inclination is to stuff then in to a confined space. i digress.
i think there shoudl be a warning on the altoid tins, “do not store with plastics and paper products”. maybe i can get move.org to organize an online petition to send to my congress person.
2 responses so far ↓
1 rcg // Feb 19, 2004 at 2:25 pm
Sue the bastards. Class action. Exploit your country’s litiginous culture. Give me a cut if you win, for having suggested legal action.
2 B // Feb 19, 2004 at 8:17 pm
For those of you like me,
http://rough.catharsis.org/dd/ats.html
defines ‘Altoid’ as
Main Entry: Al?toid
Pronunciation: “ael’toId
Function: oral pleasure
Etymology: Latin altus-: high, + Greek -eidos: form. THE HIGHEST FORM OF CANDY.
Clever.
The Counting Crows have a song called ‘Hard Candy’ that compares its rich flavor to memories of youth: the sweetness hides utter vacuity.
And what about these explosive paper napkins? Did they not become lethal due to the propinquity of several seemingly innocent and unrelated over-the-counter items? This sounds like the work of the Joker!