So it’s been a couple full weeks at the new job now, and I think some
patterns have started to develop. All in all this working from home thing
is pretty cool. There are clear and obvious advantages: the commute, and
recently i had a meeting with myself and decided to move casual fridays
to casual everydays ( I expect to save myself a bundle on dry cleaning-although
I don’t take myself as seriously when I’m not wearing a suit). I do miss
some aspects of going to an office though. I think my immune system has
been compromised, i somehow came down with the flu over the weekend, nothing
serious (thanks for asking) just a low lever fever for 3 days. One disadvantage
of working from home is that you can’t really call in sick, i mean all
i do is sit in front of a computer, how can you get out of that?
I have taken to shaving only once a week, it’s wonderful. In fact it
reminds me of being unemployed, very Mr. Mom actually. This morning, in
a sudden flash if inspiration(no doubt a result of not drinking since
friday) I decided to leave myself a moustache, not just a little fuzzy
lip, but the grand-pappy down the side goatee without the flavor saver
style. You know the one that the biker
guy in the Village People had, and come to think of it James
Hetfield from Metallica had one too. I can’t wait to see what natty
says.
In the hope of creating a tension filled office atmosphere I have endeavo(u)red
to take on all the typical roles and personalities of people in cubicle
environments. So far I have:
- Complained to myself about it being too hot 3 times, too cold once
and too dry 2 times. - I have caught myself looking at my ass twice. I have warned myself
about unprofessional and off color, and inappropriate comments 13 times. - I have told myself to keep personal phone conversations to personal
time 2 times. - I hate myself because i’m always kissing up to myself and wearing
tight clothing as if that would get myself to give myself a promotion,
everyone knows that I have been here longer than myself and I have a
better background than myself. - I am also very resentful towards myself to not taking myself out to
a welcome lunch, but this place seems very ‘cliquey’ and obviously I’m
not hip enough to hang out with myself–i’m prolly just insecure in
my job skills. - I have complained that the coffee is too strong 3 times and too weak
9 times. - I have called myself about getting a water cooler 2 times.
- And most of all I hate the way I check my voicemail on speaker phone
so that everyone can hear all the “important” calls that I get.
In other news, my tearful reunion with Krucoff was derailed by my sickeness.
I had visons of him in a nurse uniform thoughtfully spongeing my feverish
forehead with a damp towel, but in the end i think that’s a bit to vivid
to be healthy. good lord. it’s been 4 days since i left the apartment,
that can’t be good.